Academy Award for Best Actor Ever
The Academy Award for Best Actor Ever has been handed out on numerous, contradictory occasions. This page contains every actor to be given the award: Seymour Phillip "Hoffman" Seymour Winner in both 2005 (Mulan 3) and 2015 (The Master 2: Masters of Dubstep) Sir T.E. Laurence "Larry of Arabia" Olivier Winner in 1963 for the portrayal of fictional actor Peter O'Toole (a pornagraphic alias he'd borrowed) in his meta-role as Lawrence of Arabia. Jim Varney Winner in 1987 (Ernest Goes to Camp), 1988 (Ernest Goes to Gomorrah), 1989 (Ernest Versus King Ghidorah), and 1990 (Ernest: Just Playin! With Grant Hill and Danny DeVito) Lenny Montana Winner in 1972, Montana was only a part-time actor and spent the majority of his life working in Astrophysics and Particle Accelleration Mechanics. Also a noted author, Montana gave speeches accross the country, spreading his positive motivational philosophy, gaining him both romantic admirers and a loyal fanbase. Slavoj Zizek has been quoted as saying: "Lenny Montana is the most influential scholar of the 20th century." Montana is currently in a semi-frozen state, with his brain running most of what is considered Google. Marlon Brando Possibly the most attractive leading man in history (while young), this big dumb animal made his bones for a movie in which he spends the duration screaming at and beating his wife, Stella, before raping Stella's sister and having her committed to mental institution (A Streetcar Named Desire, 1951). Later he played an extremely old mob boss with cotton lining his cheeks and a penchant for oranges both during an assassination attempt on him and when actually dying in front of his oblivious grandson (The Godfather, 1972), before jumping the shark by anally raping a woman on screen, using a stick of butter as lubricant (Last Tango in Paris, 1972). He then gained an outrageous amount of weight, believing that if it was good enough for Orson Welles, it was good enough for him, and breifly staged a comeback by playing a crazed Colonel in a Vietnam War film (Apocalypse Now, 1979) but quickly squandered this good will and dropped out of the public eye after his son murdered somebody and he tried to make it about it him. James Dean Not to be confused with noted diabetic racist Paula Dean, James Dean was an actor that your mom still gets emarassingly erotic about while discussing his films, despite his decapitating himself with a Porshe Spyder / Mack Truck combo punch before she was even born, his having only been in three films total (the only one of which worth watching being one where he gets in a teenage switchblade duel and dates that woman Wood that Cristopher Walken later killed in real life Without a Cause, 1955), and his being as openly gay as the mid fifties allowed teen idols to be is precisely gay enough to be exempt from being drafted into the Korean War for reasons of Homosexuality, while not being so gay as to arouse suspicion of subversion among members of the Senate Subcommittee on Unamerican Activites. Lon Chaney The greatest non-comedic silent film actor of all time, Lon Chaney not only played monsters in his film - he pioneered what is now called "method acting," which is to say he actually became monsters, as he was never taught that acting was supposed to be pretend. The overacting necessary for silent films also came easily to him because both his parents were deaf and they communicated with their son via facial expressions alone. Most impressively, in one of many movies in which he starred as a circus freak, his character was an armless guitar player and Chaney actually taught himself to play quitar with his feet, presumably also cutting off his arms for the duration of filming.